Friday
Sep032010
Keep the bastards honest
Friday, September 3, 2010 at 07:00AM A Reddit reader posits:
What if, during political campaigning, candidates had to wear a NASCAR-driver suit that had the patches of their campaign sponsors?
The fly in the ointment is that some candidates would have to be the size of 50 Chris Christies to fit on all the patches.
Reader Comments (8)
Excellent idea !
WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR
REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?
'My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed.
Since Congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq . This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom, Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.
TEN EVERY YEAR THEREAFTER It'll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO
BROKE IN 20 YEARS.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes
and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine ? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France .
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward
solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations.
Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from
the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize?
ry France or maybe China .
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France , and>Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets.
Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world.
I love New York.
A special note to our neighbors: Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to
be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.
Mexico is also on List 2. Its president and his entire corrupt government really
need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple thousand extra tanks and infantry
divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep, border security.
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska -which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If
you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some >will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, 'darn tootin.'
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world
has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is
time to eliminate hunger in America . It is time to eliminate homelessness in America
. To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought : You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America .. Thank you and good night.'
If you can read this in English, thank a soldier.
"President Barack Obama will speak to reporters Friday after the Labor Department
releases its monthly jobless report.
Analysts expect the unemployment rate to rise slightly, to 9.6 percent from 9.5 percent.
In the afternoon, the president will leave for the Camp David presidential retreat in
the Catoctin (kuh-TAHK'-tin) Mountains of Maryland."
WOW! PRESIDENT BOZO IS WORKING SO HARD, HE NEEDS ANOTHER VACATION!
WHEN IS THAT BUZZARD GOING TO DO SOMETHING POSITIVE FOR AMERICAN CITIZENS?
"UNEMPLOYMENT JUMPS TO 9.6%...
Economy LOST 283,000 jobs during 'Recovery Summer' months...
NPR: 'Recovery Summer' Ends With Economic Pothole..."
MORE WELFARE, PLEASE!
WAY TO GO OBAMMIE!
"Feds sue Arizona sheriff in civil rights probe"
"AP – Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio speaks to the media after learning the U.S. Justice Department is … .By AMANDA LEE MYERS and PAUL DAVENPORT, Associated Press Writer Amanda Lee Myers And Paul Davenport, Associated Press Writer – Thu Sep 2, 7:49 pm ET
PHOENIX – "The Justice Department sued the nation's self-proclaimed "toughest sheriff" on Thursday, calling Joe Arpaio's defiance of an investigation into his office's alleged discrimination against Hispanics "unprecedented.""
OBAMMIE'S GESTAPO, THE IN-JUSTICE DEPARTMENT, DOING THE EMPEROR'S BUSINESS!
"WE GOTTA KEEP THOSE ILLEGALS IN THE STATES TO VOTE FOR ME"!
"Payne: The irony of Jesse Jackson's stripped SUV
Henry Payne / The Michigan View.com
Add Jesse Jackson’s ride to prominent vehicles being stripped in Detroit."
"Following the embarrassing news that Mayor Dave Bing’s GMC Yukon was hijacked by criminals this week, Detroit’s Channel 7 reports that the Reverend’s Caddy Escalade SUV was stolen and stripped of its wheels while he was in town last weekend with the UAW’s militant President Bob King leading the “Jobs, Justice, and Peace” march promoting government-funded green jobs.
Read that again: Jackson’s Caddy SUV was stripped while he was in town promoting green jobs.
Add Jesse to the Al Gore-Tom Friedman-Barack Obama School of Environmental Hypocrisy. While preaching to Americans that they need to cram their families into hybrid Priuses to go shopping for compact fluorescent light bulbs to save the planet, they themselves continue to live large."
PROBABLY A BUNCH OF WHITIES!
ALL POLITICIANS ARE BASTARDS,
AND NONE OF THEM ARE HONEST!
Have the sense to come up with something on our own and stop posting stupid Right Wing whack job emails! A simple search of the web brings htis one up all over the place. At least be honest and admit what you have done in cutting and pasting this!