Guess what's swinging over at Wyomissing Junior/Senior High? A backpack!

A teacher busted some 15-year-old student catching a smoke in the Wyomissing Junior/Senior High lavatory. The assistant principal went to question the lad. The boy swung his backpack. The assistant principal tried to snatch it. He fell down and cut his arm. They took him to the hospital. The school went into lockdown mode as cops scoured the school for the backpack boy.

It was perhaps the sissiest assault involving a Berks school administrator since Reading school directors Pierre Cooper and Keith Stamm got into a scuffle last January. Stamm banged his knee, went to the emergency room, and rented a wheelchair. Stamm said he was left terribly traumatized.

Now here's the kicker. Because the Reading Eagle ran a story running down the left-hand column on Page One yesterday with the headline "Police: 2 RHS boys fight cop, guard," the Wyomissing police blotter runs in exactly the same spot today. That's so the editors can puff like peacocks about fairness and insist they don't run just bad news out of Reading High on the front page. See, when the suburban kids act up, those schools get the bad PR, too.

Of course, one story involves beating on a cop and the other...a backpack.

The insanity of that logic makes you want to head over to Excitement Energy, where the ad on Page C4 says you can get a free Deep Throat. It's an energy drink.